Vacation 2013--Day #1 and 2

We just returned from a family vacation.  For one week we were in Tennessee with one of our sons and his wife and 2 children.  We like to go to Tennessee, stay in a cabin and rest.  We personally are not big shoppers, do not do a lot of touristy things, but we do enjoy sight seeing what GOD has made!  So mountains are something to do that we enjoy.

For years, we use to go once a year to the mountains with out the children.  We would go for a few days up to a week.  We would drive our large 15 passenger van, and have no set plans -just head south.

We stayed in stay our van (having removed most of the seats and placing a mattress down, along with camping gear. ) I made curtains for the windows,  during the day they were open, but we could close them at night. This gave nice privacy.

We used a camp stove, along with a few pots, and a good cast iron skillet we were set!  We loaded up a cooler-brought along some home canned meats, and vegs, to make traveling with meat easy---that was it.

We often would drive somewhere on the  blue ridge parkway-from one state to another.  We stayed in the van, sleeping inside of it., parked on the blue ridge or in some parking lot somewhere each night.  We only had one problem all those years, once we heard someone out side the van and woke up without hubcaps.  They were cheap ones, so no big deal really--we figured it was teens ---no damage to the van---that was most important!

IT was important for us to do things together, without the children as they were growing up.  After all, soon they would be grown and out of the house-and it would just be us again-so this time together was very important.  Usually the last night we were gone, we would stay at a cabin in the smokeys.  This gave us a chance to take a shower (all week it was washing up in the van with a bucket!)

We enjoyed the cabins so would often bring the children down on vacation about every other year.

So now, here we were going down again, only with one of the grown children and his family!

We left Friday early morning, about 3-3:30 am. Nathan and his family came to our home and spent the night, so we could all leave easily in the morning.

We planned to drive straight thru...stopping only to fill up the car and occasionally at a rest stop...

at a rest stop, after the little ones awoke for the morning

we had a snack breakfast on the road of trail mix, and fruit, but decided to stop in Kentucky at a restaurant.  The food was not good, really (at a well known restaurant) and the service was awful.  Food was cold when it arrived, and refills for the drinks never came. A few of us ended up getting a bit ill from the food -so never eating at that chain of well known restaurants again!  The manager did give us a discount, but really- after we became ill, I think the state inspectors should check the place out!

Then its back on the road again!

We arrived at the cabin in the late afternoon.  We had only one night here (hidden mountain west) then we would leave and go to the East side tomorrow.

There is a pool table in this cabin!  I showed the children how to play pool with out using the pool sticks (safer that way)

 

"mom" helping find something for the children, grampa is in the back ground ---looking confused about something!

The view from the deck

The kitchen 

outside the cabin

The next day (Sabbath-aka Saturday) we left in the morning and headed to the mountains.  We went to the Aquarium today, since we could not check into the other location until 4 pm, we decided to sight see!~

me and my honey

amazed by the things they were seeing

yes, its a shark

fun pushing buttons learning things about how GOD designed a fish

I cant believe people eat these---yuk

digging for bones

digging for bones

looking at the dinosaurs 

happy its not real~

inside the observation tube to see the penguins 

and the final thing they were able to see----

more later on day 3 thru 8

New blog

I have begun another blog, about gardening --- Click here.

Birthday...

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....

That has been my theme verse for over a year now.  I guess its all I can hold onto at this point--after GOD and my family.  Hope.  Hope is all I have, without it---I will die.

waiting outside the court house room 

Its been a year-from birthday to birthday---marking off 365 days from one event to the next.  Last year for my 50th birthday, I was sitting at the county court house waiting to hear if I would have the hearing or not.

people gathered waiting with us....friends, family, all here to support me!

My friends, and family were there.  (yes I do remember who was there and who was not-friends, family, and clients-and I also remember those who really wanted to be there, but could not due to work or other commitments, but still fully supported me. I thank you!! )

 Those of you have been true with your support, faithful when I need you--all I can say is thank you!  GOD/YHWH has seen your support, seen how you came beside me and allowed me to lean on you when I needed to.  Being faithful like that--when someone is down, hurting, is just like being the good Samaritan.  The person needing help does not have to have just been robbed and beat up like in the story, that is not the point to the story.  The point is that you see someone that needs help, you help.  You reach out, outside of your comfort zone even, and help.  The good Samaritan did not know the guy, he did not know if he was a bad man to others who had been beat up for sins he had done, he just helped him because it was the right thing to do.

But how does some who know me help or support?  They judged me, left me as a friend, turned their backs on me---yes, I remember those who would not be there---no matter what---yes I remember you too. For those of you who did not support me- did not want to support me---I remember your lack of support at such a very difficult time in my life. I remember ....But, I chose forgive you a long time ago---only because it is the best thing for me to do for myself.  I dont forget though.  But if I would see you hurting, needing help, I would still be there because that is the type of person I am, regardless of how you have treated me.

              GOD/YHWH knows, and HE has been faithful, has been there for me --no matter what.

Well, so we were finally called in, and it took a whole 30 seconds.  Made the judge mad, because my family walked in to sit down-and the judge says: who is she with her entourage messing up my court room with 'noise'........( as they walked in to sit down.)  30 seconds later, they were standing up and walking out.  I told my attorney in the hall after words that my family and friends (again true friends and true clients) will ALWAYS be there when ever I am in court.  No matter how many months, years it takes.  He says yes he knows.

a good friend and fellow midwife here with her family all for support of me! 

clients and their families! 

dinner after the court hearing-2012

Do you know that Susan B.  Anthony was a woman of faith, but also a mover and shaker to make changes for women too.  She broke the laws, she made changes that those who have opposed me and what I have went thru, live and are reaping the benefits from.  On June 18th, in 1873 Susan B. Anthony was fined $100 dollars for attempting to vote for the President.  (against the law back then-so she broke the law) Laws that are not right, if not challenged, will never be changed. are you brave enough to do something like this? Even if it means jail time? Do you realize that the $100.00 then would be about $1980 today?  ( calculate here)  Read more here

Now here 15 months later I still wait for this to be done and over with.. This county is totally messed up.  Why with NO complaints, NO bad outcome, am I still waiting to finish this?  Another midwife in a different county faced arrest too, but there were some bad outcomes with births, (nothing she actually caused to happen, but they still charged her with stuff) and her case is DONE. Done in about 3-4 months.  This county I live in has a reputation at being very very slow.  Our tax dollar pays for what?

Today I turn 51.  I still wait for this to be over.

I have lost friends, lost clients.  When clients whom you have served make a choice to not have you attend their birth again, it does hurt. It has not been too many actually, and I am grateful for that.  I give a lot to my clients, for me---it is like being in a marriage in a way-so when they do not use me again, it is like a divorce to my heart.  But GOD / YHWH can heal that too.  As for friends, I guess they were not real friends then if they made the choice to not stay.

 I know if I could have had a choice of a midwife attended birth with my births,  I would have followed my midwife anywhere--but that is me.  I was not given a choice like that.  I was forced into hospital births.

I have gained friends, gained clients.  GOD alone replaces.  There have been some very very sweet clients whom have chosen to stay with my care.  They have 'followed' me to where ever I can deliver, and I thank you for that!  They trust in what GOD has given me with a gift to serve them, and so where I can serve, them come. I look forward to the future to serving them some day in their own homes instead of up in Michigan where they need to come for now. As for new friends, many!  I love that.  GOD replaces.  HE really does!

I continue to wait on YHWH and trust HIM.

It is all I can do...
for now, happy birthday to me....maybe I will watch a movie....

Indiana GOV signs midwife bill into law!

Photo taken by Michelle Sanders CPM
I wrote this months ago, and never posted it.  I will post it now.

This past week in the state of Indiana, the bill to license Certified Professional Midwives (CPM's) was signed into law by our Governor.  I did not attend, because I had been up all night with a birth in Michigan at the Birth center with one of my favorite clients/family--- who travels from over 2 hours away to use my services!  I am so blessed!

I want to thank everyone who has helped with this process, who has wrote letters to get this bill thru, who has made phone calls and contacted their elected officials.  Thank you.  It is you the consumer who they will listen to, and so it is you the consumer that made the difference.

I am sooo thankful for those who have stuck by my side thru this very tough year, who have and continue to use my services.  As a midwife, it is sort of like a marriage.  We make an agreement of service to our clients, and they also make an agreement to us-we build trust, a relationship, and when it continues birth after birth, thru the tough times, and easy times, it is so beautiful.  I thank you for your loyalty.  I love what I do, and I love my clients!

Very few have left my services, so for all of you who have stayed by me, used my services, and are still planning on using my services, I thank you!!  I have been so blessed by the  phone calls, letters and support. It is really wonderful and needed-in many ways that I can not even share or tell you, but YHWH knows! Thank you! I can not express enough how very much I appreciate you sticking with me, using my care for your birth, and support thur the process of getting this bill passed.  Your comments and letters brighten my days, and when I have those days I am down, I re-read those messages, and the LORD uses them to lift me up.

The birth center up in Michigan is going very well, and those who have traveled to use its facilities, have been truly blessed!  Many have said, where ever I am-they will go, because they want my services and that is  more important to them than where they deliver.  I thank each of you for that! That alone shows the support I have had this past year.  The birth center has held its own, and we pray it continues to grow and is blessed.  GOD has a calling for me with the service of women, and as long as HE has called me, I will go....

Blessings to you!
Ireena

Sing-Daughter of Zion!

I wrote this post a year ago, so will publish it now...finally

¹⁴ 

Sing, Daughter Zion;

    shout aloud, Israel!
Be glad and rejoice with all your heart,
    Daughter Jerusalem!
¹⁵ The Lord has taken away your punishment,
    he has turned back your enemy.
The Lord, the King of Israel, is with you;
    never again will you fear any harm.
¹⁶ On that day
    they will say to Jerusalem,
“Do not fear, Zion;
    do not let your hands hang limp.
¹⁷ The Lord your God is with you,
    the Mighty Warrior who saves.
He will take great delight in you;
    in his love he will no longer rebuke you,
    but will rejoice over you with singing.”

¹⁸ “I will remove from you
    all who mourn over the loss of your appointed festivals,
    which is a burden and reproach for you.
¹⁹ At that time I will deal
    with all who oppressed you.
I will rescue the lame;
    I will gather the exiles.
I will give them praise and honor
    in every land where they have suffered shame.
²⁰ At that time I will gather you;
    at that time I will bring you home.
I will give you honor and praise
    among all the peoples of the earth
when I restore your fortunes^[a]
    before your very eyes,”
says the Lord.

Zephaniah 3:14-20

                           It has been a whole year...
                                                               since my arrest.

  By dates ---the year is here, this past weekend-although it happened on a Sabbath...March 31st, 2012.

Diary: 2013

Sunday the 31st:
I was up last night, hard to sleep the whole night. So from being tired this morning, that allowed me to sleep in-past the time of the actual arrest.  Then hubby cooked me a breakfast, which was not as good as last years-but still ok.  He actually forgot what today 'was'.  I think if he would have remembered, perhaps we would have left the house early just to not be here-- with the memory.

This past year, has been a HUGE learning experience for me.  To begin with, myself and my family were exiled from a church that I use to attend.  Many who attend there, do not even know what all really happened, what all was really said by some from there-- to myself and my family.  Most important GOD/YHWH heard all and knows all. I will not argue this with anyone, so if your reading this, and want to fight with me about it-forget it.  I am past trying to work with anyone there.  I have kicked the dust off from my feet and moved on.

So that is it for that.

 Life is too short. There are too many people out in the world who do not know the LORD YESHUA as their savior, who live with out basic needs, for me to stay behind and fight with people--a group--- that do not as a usual, even reach out to others on the mission field 

Mission work? I have worked at that for years, 20 years actually---even with the leadership of a church opposing my efforts.  I sat before the board of elders-I will never forget that-and was accused of not following the LORD, not doing HIS will all because they did not agree with me.  Told me that the old testament scriptures I was sharing with them, were "not for today".  really?    Another reason for no support: they did not see anyone getting saved.  Really?  I am a seed planter.  I know that, I accept that, and know that I will not see the harvest for the most part.  It is amazing that people think you will plant the seed, water it and then sit there and watch for the harvest.  It does not always work that way.  I know that.

Scott and I attended this 'church' for over 29 years, (our second child, a son, was 6 weeks old when we began to attend there) --(minus about 5 years in the middle of that time where we left after a church split) and thus I can say I do know how things were. We were there in the 'beginning'.   That is a long time to commit to  someplace, even with our differences with some people.  The lies that was told about me, GOD/YHWH knows all.  I give it to HIM.

I moved on.
Now to finish healing.....

the air plane (yes with propellars!) from Portland to Eugene!

April 1st:
Monday, I flew out to a conference in Eugene Oregon.

I believe this is Mt Hood,  (I was told on the plane) How tall that mountain stands to be well above the clouds like this...

Hermine and myself...

 I was involved with a summit on the persecution of midwives across the nation.  This was an all day pre-conference event hosted by Midwifery Today- sponsored by Midwifery today and Human Rights in Childbirth (HRiC). Hermine Hayes-Klein who put on the Human Rights in Childbirth Conference in the Hague 2012, led the discussion.


  This is also my first Midwifery Today conference.

I arrived, and that evening went to dinner with about 25-30 other people, some attorneys, some persecuted midwives or birth workers, and some who were here to support us all. We ate at a Tia restaurant.

After a good meal, we returned to the hotel, and I turned in for the night.  It was about 10-11 pm out here, but back home---and for my internal clock-it was 1-2 am!

I had NO idea how this day---would effect me, this pre-conference summit, for human rights about birth.  I was crying, more than I have in a long time.

The day of my arrest, I cried all day, then I did not cry much at all until I began to attend a (new to us) fellowship of believers, different from the church who disowned me the day I was arrested.  The first few times we were at this fellowship, I sat and cried.  A lot-it felt like.  Sometimes I just would walk away to another room and sit, because I was crying so...hurtful tears, mourning tears, and healing tears. I was accepted at this new 'fellowship' but I still needed healing.  That would take months....

Since then, I have not cried much at all. And this day of the Summit-the healing began.  No longer judged for being arrested, just given strength in return for standing up for the rights of others-

When I was arrested, the bail bonds man gave us small hand cuffs with her name on them, and for the past year, this set has hung on my door.  I see them when I go out, and come in. It has been a constant reminder, of what I have went thru.  Consistent reminder to pray too before I leave the house .

I have kept my back doors covered, my windows covered, not allowing anyone to come up and able to look into my home.  If your at my door, you would not be able to see into my home. It is a protective thing for me.

GOD / YHWH told me to bring those handcuffs to the conference, and I was to 'wear' them as jewelry  on the day of the summit.  I obeyed.  They were wrapped around my left wrist.  I share them as I spoke and gave my testimony. The summit lasted all day....  Testimony from  midwives, doctors who have been persecuted  a panel of attorneys from all over-even other countries who have worked for the basic human rights of people were there.  It was a humbling honor to have been asked and to participate in this discussion.

Myself on the panel, The woman to my left, at the microphone is Robbie Davis-Floyd, she is not on the panel but led the discussion.  I will not show the other panel members to protect them...

GOD has a bigger plan.  Remember, a year before I was arrested, HE told me I would be arrested-I asked him no, I would rather not, but said I would obey HIM.  I could have stopped then.  I could have moved away-like to a state where I can get that state license, (example in Virginia I hold a license from the state medical board-yes really!) But GOD /YHWH has a bigger plan and I am to be involved in that.

SO with the handcuffs----Once the summit was over, HE told me that Jan was to remove them, (Jan T. is the one who began Midwifery Today, and is so wonderful and giving, a real friend. )  and I was to leave them with her.  Again, I obeyed- obedience is important.   I do not need to know the reasons-I just need to obey.    It helped to continue the flow of tears for me, and also the healing.  I was allowing the freedom that HE had done for me, even with this arrest-to begin working in my heart.

Jan Tritten and Myself, holding the removed hand cuffs. 

Now tonight, at the Christian Midwives meeting, again, healing....My friend Brenda who has also been arrested, we were so blessed tonight.  As well as others who have went thru this.  Beautiful group of women, singing...... worshiping YHWH and HIS SON and all they have done for us...

Praising and worshiping HIM in song, dance, prayer, HE blessed me with more healing tears...

I will post this now....
and for now, perhaps I can truly sleep peacefully for the first time in a long time....

There is healing....

Of the Spring Time Of the Resurrection

She had 2 sons, and was wishing for another baby.  She was sure she was pregnant, but then one day, she experienced a loss.  She was not that far along, but it was still very sad.

Many weeks later-early one morning when her husband was getting up for work, he knelt down by the bed at her side, and whispered in her ear, that he was so sorry for their loss, and that he wanted anther baby too.  He had thought she was sleeping so she stayed quiet, as he prayed over her.  She treasured this in her heart.

Then a few months later, she thought she might again be expecting a baby.  So she took a test.  It was her oldest sons 4th birthday.  The test was positive. She was excited.

Late in the day her phone rang, her only brother-his wife had died, well, was actually killed -in surgery.  the OR team had made a mistake.  Their actions resulted in the death of her sister in law.

She chose to only tell her husband the good news of her expecting a baby.  She would not share it for weeks out of respect to her family.

Now here she was, in labor for this 3rd child. again her heart longed for a baby to be born at home.  But that was not to be.

It was day time, and she thought that she was in labor, but the contractions were not like a normal contraction.  As they began, it felt like the breath was knocked out of her, and then she had butterflies in her tummy.  That feeling would last about 30-60 seconds then go away.  This happened all day long and were about 10 minutes apart.

When her husband come home, they decided to go into the hospital.  She was in labor, but early labor.   She continued to contract, and by evening was 6cm. But by 11 pm that night the contractions started to space apart and slow down.  She could now sleep so they unhooked the monitor and told her she could sleep.  This birth happened back when the hospital would not allow the husbands to stay the night, or if they did, they had to sit up in a hard chair all night.  So her husband decided to go home for the night.  They would call him if things started again.  They only lived 5 minutes or so from the hospital so she thought it would be fine.

So she slept all night.  In the morning the doctor came in and broke her water.  Things began to pick up then.  She did consent to a IV, which now looking back wished she did not.  There was another woman in labor at the same time, and they were about the same progress.  So at one time she was up walking as well as the other woman was too, and they were talking with the doctor, they teased her that they were both saying---'I get you" to the doctor, who laughed and promised that she would be there for both of them at their births!


Her husband had long since made it back to the hospital.  She continued in labor, and soon she was ready to go to the delivery room.  They would not allow her to use the birthing room this time.  (they tried real hard to not use that room) during these years the way the hospital birthed was you labor in a labor room, that was a very small room, large enough for a twin size hospital bed, and chair stuffed in the corner.  Then you were moved to a delivery room which was a large impersonal room, cold metal table you delivered on.

So she was waiting since the change of shifts with the nurses, for someone to come in soon.  Finally a nurse did (she knew this nurse from growing up) she told her she thought she was ready.
She finally hurried her back to the delivery room, but she was not at all ready.  The doctor was there, and no one was 'ready' to catch this baby!

The doctor told her not to push, but she was having such a difficult time.  The baby was coming even though she was not pushing!  She told her doctor that!  The doctor had one glove on and was holding her other hand out for the nurse to put a glove on it!
Then her new daughter was born! All 7# and 1 ounce of her!

All the black hair, and blue eyes! I am now 4 days late in writing this for you daughter, but this year-2013, you turned 27 years old.

your name: 

 Anastasia (meaning: Of the Spring Time Of the Resurrection).
 Kay- is after my middle name, which was after my God mother, Katherine.

"Calmness of The Heavens..."

The contractions were still happening-even after all of the rest and medications....  She was tired of 'resting'.  She wished for a midwife, she wished to be able to do a home birth.  But there was no home birth midwife to be found.  Her husband did not want to go unassisted...so to the hospital they would go.

Care from a OB was ok, she was more attentive with her than her other clients, at least that is what the nurses told her.  Actually, a few weeks ago- she had gotten brave enough to attempt to switch to a Midwife who was serving in a different hospital, made the appointment and everything, but the OB had agreed to all of her demands when she had told her she would be changing care providers, -so she canceled that appointment.  The OB agreed to everything --except one....

She knew when she was due, and yet-the OB was going by the new 'toy' in the office.  An ultra sound.  Little was known as of yet about ultra sounds, so health care providers believed they were safe.  She had now had 3 of them....

Years later she would learn the truth and she would regret her decision to allow those to be done...but for now, she trusted her care provider...trusted her comments and suggestions.

Except for their disagreement of the due date.  And she disagreed with her OB telling her that she was not ready to deliver this baby.  That the baby was not ready.  She knew she was ready.  She knew that the baby was also ready.  But the medical community right now felt that to deliver even 2 weeks early was a big no -no.  So she had been sent home after they had 'stopped' her labor, she was 4 centimeters, and was told to stay on bed rest.  But now, she was tired of all of this.

Tonight, she would be up walking around, tonight was a date night-a family night, so they would go out to eat as a family.

That evening they went to the family restaurant in a town a half an hour away, where they could get family style.  Her husband and 3 children, all ate a hardy meal-she ate about 6 pieces of chicken herself, lots of mashed potatoes and gravy, and plenty of stuffing.  She felt 'stuffed'.

Everyone asked when she was due, and she would just smile and say soon.  But those twinges that were coming so softly now, were regular.  She did not think it would be long.

When they were done, and when they stood up to go, she felt it stronger when standing--- she had to take her daughter to the restroom, but it was getting difficult to walk.  She she swayed and waddled.  Standing felt difficult to her, she felt heavier...the pains felt stronger.  They did not hurt, but she knew they were serious.

By the time she came out of the bathroom with her daughter, she was doubled over with a strong contraction.  She told her husband they needed to go quickly.  Everyone around her just looked and whispered...the cashier hurried them thru the line.

On the drive home, she suggested to her husband to stop at a friends home to see if they could drop off the children.  No one was home.  This was years before cell phones, before she would own a cell phone....

They made it home and she called her family, as her husband put the children to bed.  A family member, one of them, would come up to stay with the children.  But no one was home.  Not one family member on either side of their families.   So her husband got the children back out of bed.  Meanwhile, she had went to the bathroom... pressure she was feeling a lot of pressure, she did something that medical people said to never do-she reached up inside and felt for her cervix.  She was greeted with a large water balloon, and knew she was open to about 6cm.  So back out to the living room she went.  Her water could go at any time!

She began to read the bible story about when the donkey spoke to the 3 children sitting now on the couch, as her husband got the children's things packed for staying away from home.   She read with earnest and the children listed not.   They were focused on their mother as she would stop now and then and pant ...they found this odd.  They were worried about her, worried that she was hurting and they told her so.

Finally, into the car they piled and off to town they headed.    If they had to take the children into the hospital-  they would.

But-finally- the very last place they stopped, that couple was home and as she started to get out to help unload the children, they told her no, and quickly grabbed all of the items. they could tell she was in active labor.  She handled it well, but her breathing was a hard panting....

Now it was just her, the baby and her husband.  They were blocks from the hospital, and when they arrived she was taken quickly up to the OB unit.  Her husband was called away to sign her in, this was so frustrating, why take him away when she was so close.

Earlier, she had called a friend who wanted to see a natural birth, and that friend now arrived at the hospital.  They prayed for things to go smoothly and quickly.  The nurse had checked her, and felt that she had some time yet to  get her "ready" for delivery.  A saline lock would be placed in the back of her hand for the "just in case".  The nurse struggled starting that, first dropping the needle, needing to get a second one, then trying again.  Meanwhile, she had had 2 contractions since the nurse had 'checked' her.  She felt the baby move down, and felt like she might be ready to push. Yes, the pressure was greater and she was sure she would be able to push now... SO she told the nurse, but the nurse looked at her and said no your not.  After all, she had been laughing, and laughing women do not go this fast in labor ...laughing women are not in enough pain to be that far along....or so the medical world thinks....

But she still encouraged her to check...and after checking her again-the nurse said, oh no, don't push!  And away she went running leaving her alone, with the friend in the room, and her husband still out of the room because not more than 1 person can be in the room with her....

The doctor arrived and asked her why she was not back in the delivery room yet?  The doctor  knew how fast she delivered, and so she pushed her  back to the delivery room herself---where was the nurse?   Her husband sat at her side, and her friend was allowed to stand in the doorway of the delivery room....eventually the nurse showed up and kept saying "I ain't never seen a birth like this..."

just a few pushes later, a little baby girl was born....

and that was 24 years ago....today....

Happy Birthday
~Nalani (meaning calmness of the heavens)
~Rose (after your grandmother, Rosella)